Father Chip’s Devotional: Hazmat Removal—God’s Way

July 1, 2011

Bible Reading: ^“Be silent, and know that I am God! ”–Psalm 46:1

Bonus Readings: Ephesians 4:30-32; Luke 17:3-4; Matthew 5:23-24; Hebrews 12:14-16

Offense. Easy to take. Easy to keep. Really low maintenance…just keep it away from Grace. And…anybody can have it. Been there, done that. Got the T-shirt. But redeemed, praise God.

Jeff Caliguire is a Cornell University and Dallas Theological Seminary-educated entrepreneur who wrote Leadership Secrets of Saint Paul after learning many of them the hard way: “I simmered over things that weren’t going my way,” he says. “I painted worst-case scenarios. My depression affected my marriage, my health, and my children.” Ultimately, he says, like the apostle, we must begin to see ourselves as servants if we expect to be truly effective over the long haul. Caliguire found out: offense is just another choice we make in life’s spiritual cafeteria. This is exactly where I found myself not long ago. I had chosen it and allowed it to persist a while. And when I really got down to it, my offense was…all about me. I think that’s the thing. We insist on our rights.

Sometimes we say that we’re sorry. But, in our hearts, we hold on to the offense. We pet it, cultivate it, nurture it…and let it continue. We’ve gotta go further than that. Let’s talk heart. Our secret places. And we all know where those are. We have to let God’s Grace redeem us…and then pass that on to each other.

C. S. Lewis writes, “To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable, because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.” Faith is living with the understanding of how much Christ has forgiven us, then turning around and forgiving someone else. It’s not easy, not by a long shot, but it’s life-giving, God-honoring work. And it’s work we gotta do. This is it: it’s not a matter of IF we get offended, it’s a matter of when. And if we don’t forgive, the results can be pervasive and insidious.

A number of years ago, a guy in a small rural town discovered a greenish, toxic rust flowing underground from an auto junkyard, making its way into a stream, then flowing through his backyard on its way to a lake. It quickly became apparent that residue from this ancient metal was polluting their water supply and possibly affecting their health. A town commission approved the obvious solution: remove the source of this hazardous waste by digging up the decomposing cars. Sooner was better than later.

Like this buried waste, unresolved tensions and unforgiveness can make their way to the surface of our lives and affect our perspective–even poison us with bitterness. Resentment is defined by Webster’s Dictionary as “a sense of injury or anger arising from a sense of wrong.” Resentments take the breath out of our work and can actually dull our vision. They zap our energy and steal the enjoyment of working with others. They build up over time and rarely dissipate on their own. Resentment and unforgiveness are hazardous materials–HAZMAT for our souls and spirits. They dilute our intellect, color our perceptions, cloud our emotions, and separate us from God and His family. The sooner we dig them up and get them out, the better our health will be.

Praise God that He gives us open and honest Christian fam that help us bear these burdens, His Word to govern our souls, and His Holy Ghost tool box to get the excavation and removal done. Our job, like in so many other Faith settings, is…to just be faithful. Do what the Word says, and let God handle the details, knowing that we received God’s Grace, and owe it to each other.

Put some Truth on It

First thing we gotta do is read Matthew 18 and communicate with each other, understanding the Word enjoins us that our anger expires at sundown. And I mean sundown on the same day. We communicate directly, honestly, but with the intention of not injuring each other or demanding our rights. We don’t justify ourselves, we don’t run away to stew on the offenses, and we don’t plan revenge. Fact is, if we don’t forgive each other, the Father doesn’t forgive us. And, if He doesn’t forgive us, He doesn’t hear our prayers. We are out of His communication loop, and we can’t live our lives that way. In God we live and move and have our being.

So, OK, that’s a no-brainer. But how about some other practical advice?

In His book, The Bait of Satan, John Bevere makes some pretty savvy points about how we respond to the offenses that invariably come in our Christian lives. Here’s a few of the best:

Dealing with the Tough Spots

If we become offended we can’t just leave. If we leave a difficult situation without the Holy Ghost’s leading, we often fail to learn the character lessons that God wanted to teach us. Thing about not learning in God’s classroom–if we don’t get the first time, we get to do it all over again. And again. And…well, you get the idea.
If we do leave a difficult situation without the Holy Spirit’s leading, it may take many years before we see the offense we have kept hidden in our heart. God will eventually make us face our problem, even though we may avoid it for many years. If God does not, we may never come to grips with our own character flaws, and never come to the place of maturity we need to live victorious lives in the Lord, doing the job he has for us.

Reconciliation

If we won’t forgive someone deep in our heart, then we are waiting for vengeance. We have made ourselves the judge and are demanding justice before we forgive. What if Christ did this?
God wants us to make it our top priority to help a brother who has stumbled, and not try to prove ourselves correct in our judgment of him. Even if the offense was his fault, we should humble ourselves and try to be reconciled. Jesus Himself told us that!
When a brother offends us, sometimes we confront him with a wrong attitude. We want to tell him his sin more than we want to be humbly reconciled. The only way to pursue peace and true reconciliation is to maintain an attitude of humility at the expense of pride and our personal rights. Pride defends.
Humility is willing to yield and tries to find agreement. And, remember, our Bible tells us that pride precedes a fall. I, for one, have enough scars from that.
When we are ready to forgive an offense, we are eager to find a way to make peace.

Other Points

Listening to the Holy Spirit – It’s huge to stay tenderhearted and acutely sensitive to hear when the Holy Spirit is telling us we have a small area of bitterness growing in our heart. We can’t be afraid to allow Him to examine our heart. We’re truly doing this when we hear insights our fam in Christ has about our attitude, and are searching for what God wants, and not simply standing up for our “rights.”
Bitterness – The story of Absalom is a good example of how a person can become angry over a legitimate offense, but then allow bitterness to grow in his heart until it causes much evil. Absalom judged his father David, and then allowed his bitterness over his injustice to rule his life, ultimately costing him that life.

Steps to Overcome an Offense

Admit you’re hurt. Be sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s promptings. Confirm what you think He’s telling you in the Scripture.
Forgive the offender and release him from your attention on his guilt.
Practice and strengthen your ability to forgive others when they offend you. This will help you keep an injury from happening again. Stay free.
Go to a higher level of forgiveness and freedom by praying for the person who offended you. Pray like you would want Jesus to pray for you. Pray for the offender’s sake.
Go to the person and clearly, humbly communicate reconciliation, apology and forgiveness to him. Learn to love him again despite his faults. You are going for his sake, not yours. You’ve already forgiven him. Communicating reconciliation will seal your forgiveness of him and demonstrate Jesus’ nature to him.
Let God be God. Be still–know He has the situation under control.
The Holy Spirit will lead us in this process at a pace that we can handle. It may seem at times that we are only getting worse. But we will come out of the situation a more mature Christian who is thankful for this experience if we let HIm do the work.

Let’s call the Hazmat crew!

Pray about it: “Where’s my HAZMAT?”

Posted by Father Chip | Filed Under Liturgy Lessons